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Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Now Is Good

The past is part pain, part joy, a tiny bit bliss. The future could be similar. But now is good.

The space between the past and the future can be longer than a split second if you want it to be. Split seconds pass so fast I can get dizzy trying to catch one. I've decided to let now be a little longer, so I can savor it instead of watching it zip by. I'm searching for a way to dump the heavy blob of distress from traumas of the past and the fear of potential traumas. Some days I am overcome with fear of life; I wouldn't call it suicidal, but I'm thankful that I have a prescription that helps calm the terror. When I was little I would be overcome with a terror of death and fear of being alone in the universe. I just had to ride out my panic. There was no help.

Right now is OK. Right now is OK. Right now is OK.

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